I said this the other day but seriously why do I always fuck myself over for my birthday, I’m like YEAH LET’S HAVE A NICE DAY SEE ALL MY FRIENDS EAT NICE FOOD HAVE NICE DRINKS but why can’t I understand that that’s too much of a commitment for me? Nothing gives me anxiety worse than things I know I can’t get out of, it’s the actual worst, so it’s no wonder I always feel like shit as an event looms where I’m compelled to a) go and b) have fun. Not to mention c) eat, which is exponentially more difficult if I’m already struggling. But if I don’t eat, I also can’t d) drink because that’s not going to go well. 

Oh well it’ll be fine when it comes to it I’m sure. Going to the rodizio so at least you can eat as much/little as you want and not feel as freaked out. And at least I’m not in agonising pain like I was a few weeks ago! *touches wood repeatedly*