can i request some Sam/Mitch/Pat please ?

incorrectcricketquotes:

leatheronwillow:

incorrectcricketquotes:

my name is mitch
and wen it’s nite
I cry in bed
it’s qwyte a site
oh, pat or sam? sam or pat?
I stay up late
I lik my bat

my name is Sam

and wen it’s daye

“i love you” is what

i hope mitch saye

i hope he givs

me a kiss or two

before the day is don

he never do.

😦

my name is mitch
and this is tru –
my ‘keeper frend
its me not yu
so just giv up 
(its not abowt pat)
be like me
i lik my bat

my name is pat
and i just don’t care
about much beyond
my floppy hair
by day i bowl
at night i feast
(i would do yu, mitch
yu sexy beast)

o here now, pat
my schoolboy crush
such lascivious thoughts
they mak me blush
i can’t hurt sam
but the truth is, pat
I’d invyte you
to lik my bat

Sometimes I want to start the masterlist of things non-Americans find weird about America that Americans probably don’t even realise, like:

– furnace in the basement
– outdoor mailboxes
– fraternities/sororities
– popularity of college sports
– TURNING ON A RED TRAFFIC LIGHT wtf 
– mayonnaise on a sandwich instead of butter
– powdered creamer 
– no electric kettles

When you’re not sure if your blood sugar is low or you’re coming down with a nasty illness??? 

Ugh ngl, coming off my SSRIs (presumably) has fucked me up – since I stopped taking them I’m getting symptoms I’ve not had for years. :/ But on the other hand if I know they’re just cos I’m not taking them anymore maybe I can just ignore??? But don’t want to do myself any damage when the symptoms could be controlled and I’d feel better??? Probably???